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This-essay is a9906142.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %INTENTIONAL DECEPTIVE INSTINCTIVE RELATIONSHIPS 990614 Human relationships are different than relationships between electrons and protons and neutrons. The latter depend only upon the primitive properties of the individual objects and their positions and orientations relative to each other. We cannot understand human relationships in terms of our understandings of the relationships between electrons and protons and neutrons. Some human relationships are quite intentional; the fruits of conscious, intentional, extended human efforts to build the relationships in specific ways. The participants are cooperating in the work of building the relationships --- often articulating and discussing their various desires, dreams, hopes, aspirations, fears, etc. Other human relationships are quite accidental; the fruits of accidental permutations and combinations of people coming together without conscious thought, intentions, or extended human efforts to build anything. The participants may be contentious, refusing to cooperate, articulate, discuss, or listen to each other. They may in fact be seeking to avoid each other --- yet getting thrown together repeatedly by factors beyond their control. Yet, without intention they find themselves in constant interactions with each other. Yet other human relationships seem to be the product of destiny --- yet without intention, anticipation, or plan on the part of participants. People may say that they were "intended" to be brought together --- even though there was no intention on the part of the participants. They come together as if by magic, by forces/factors which are beyond their understanding or control. In such cases the outcomes may be wonderful --- or tragic in the long run. People sometimes seek to control their own or other people's relationships --- according to some formulas, systems, commandments, plans, doctrines, etc. The efforts may be "well intended", "motivated by special interests", "motivated by greed", etc. The participants may feel that they are "working to fulfill destiny", or "working to prevent a catastrophe in the making". Many such efforts are wearing, contentious, conflicted, etc. Many human relationships are quite private, unknown to others than two participants. There may be virtually no objective evidence that the relationships exist. Even the participants may be only dimly aware of the development of their relationships --- yet the relationships can eventually play major roles in their lives. Yet other human relationships can be the focus of attention of millions of admirers; as when a prince or princess gets married in a spectacular ceremony which draws world-wide attention. The outcomes of such relationships can be wonderful and/or tragic. The course of events of private relationships can depend critically upon the communal environment within which they evolve. Communities which are fearful of creative and unconventional private relationships are unlikely to enjoy the fruits of such relationships when they are at their best. It is exceedingly difficult for participants in healthy private relationships to maintain their personal and communal integrities --- while powerful members of the community around them are attempting to break into their relationships --- without invitation. Participants in relationships may be pretty much in control of their relationships; guiding them along intended paths. In other instances participants in relationships may seem to lack any control over the course of the development of their relationships; perhaps as victims or beneficiaries of relationships which seem to have minds of their own without regard for the participants. It is no simple thing to understand, influence, or exercise control over the course of human relationships. Many efforts to exercise full control over the course of even the simplest human relationships have yielded tragic outcomes. Often in such efforts --- self- righteousness, arrogance, coercion, violence, alienation, fear, prejudice, ignorance, and confusion --- have played central roles in ways which the participants have not recognized, acknowledged, named, described or talked about. If we make little or no effort to deal honestly with the rich variety of forms and kinds of human relationships, we are likely to become involved in tragic forms of human relationships. We need to be intentional in seeking to deal honestly with the rich variety of forms and kinds of human relationships; else we will suffer both personal and communal disintegrations. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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This-essay is a9906142.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. These 5 lines echo top lines. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One