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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ROOM FOR FUZZY LOGIC LOVE BOUNDARIES CERTAINTY+971008 %EITHER/OR FAILURE/SUCCESS RIGHT/WRONG SIN/EVIL+971008 %TRIGGER CORRECTIVE ACTION FIXATION CONTROL GOOD 971008 People who compulsively deal with "either/or" ways of dealing with situations want to know for certain which is the proper way of dealing with each situation. They find it difficult to tolerate uncertainty, ambiguities and paradoxes. They are insecure and feel comforted by ways of feeling certain, secure, and without doubt about each decision, question and answer. Questions are framed in terms of either/or, yes/no, acceptable/dammdable, etc. 1. Is it wright/wrong? 2. Is is required/forbidden? 3. Are they to be included/excluded? 4. Are they saved/dammed? 5. Are they acceptable/dammedable? 6. Are they perfect/imperfect? 7. Is it true/false? 8. Are they friends/foes? 9. Is it inevitable/impossible? In the world of "either/or" there is little room or occasion for "warm fuzzies" and love --- because everything is based upon pure logic, rules and regulations. Discretionary thinking, feeling, and initiatives are out of the question --- for everything must be undoubtedly certain, clear and beyond question. Discussion of uncertainties, doubts and fuzzy boundaries is out of order and a sign of faithlessness, lack of loyalty, and the work of the devil. Confidence, obedience and loyalty are in order according to the orders of leaders who are certain of themselves and sure of what others should do without question. In the world of "either/or" there is much alienation because there is much conflict over what should be certain---but is not. There is much dishonesty because people try to appear certain and sure of themselves --- when they are not. People are in conflict with each other about who should be "in" --- and who should be "out". In the world of "either/or", fuzzy boundaries cannot be tolerated and all uncertainties must be eliminated to the satisfaction of insecure people who are trying to make themselves feel secure --- while living within the threatening context of judgmental leaders who are preoccupied with making certain judgements based upon incomplete information, rules and regulations. In the world of "either/or" --- love cannot be tolerated and tolerance is intolerable --- because tolerance is based upon the conviction that uncertainty, doubt, paradoxes and fuzzy boundaries are acceptable; rather than triggers for immediate corrective action. Are people who are compulsively concerned with "either/or" ways of dealing with situations --- that way because of: genetic characteristics, early family situations, predestination, heavenly damnation, evil dispositions, character defects --- or are we here listing too many alternatives when there must be only two possible ones? (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================