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This-essay is a9708072.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %OPEN HONEST ACKNOWLEDGMENT DISCUSSION RELATIONS+970807 %INTIMATE DIALOGUE REVELATIONS INSIGHTS DESIRES+970807 %BEHAVIORS PLEASURES THOUGHTS FANTASIES INHIBIT+970807 %FAILURE INTENTION TABOO DIFFERENCE PERVERT SEX+970807 %LIBERATE MUTUAL INTERACT CONNECT REFLEXIVE ACTION 970807 We cannot behave in informed and wise ways if we cannot acknowledge, share and discuss our most significant and/or important experiences --- because of collusions, embarrassments and/or inhibitions. Such experiences include sexual aspects of our lives which entail the following --- and also our attitudes, feelings and thoughts towards the following: FANTASIES INSIGHTS DESIRES TABOOS PLEASURES BEHAVIORS INHIBITIONS FAILURES REPRESSIONS FAILURES INTENTIONS DIFFERENCES PERVERSIONS LIBERATIONS MUTUALITIES INTERACTIONS CONNECTIONS REFLECTIONS DIALOGUES MONOLOGUES REVELATIONS REPRESSIONS SUPPRESIONS COLLUSIONS Often we are controlled in disintegrative ways by external influences, inhibitions, and considerations which show no respect for our own personal integrity --- or we may be controlled in disintegrative ways by our previous unwise internalizations of such controls. It is not a simple or easy matter to transcend such disintegrative controls --- and it may appear to us to be a terrible thing to seek to transcend such disintegrative controls because of the risks of making grave mistakes in seeking to do so. If through some divine miracle we do experience some transcendence of disintegrative controls of our sexuality --- we may be terrified by the experience and feel full of shame and/or guilt --- in keeping with previous internalizations of such controls. When we are ignorant and embarrassed by our ignorance it is difficult for us individually or together to imagine how we might understand ourselves and act with both personal and communal integrity within liberating intimate relationships. Our highly respected scientific ways of dealing with many aspects of our relationships with external realities ---are impotent (powerless) in the face of the highly reflexive realities suggested above --- because they are not purely objective realities. They are highly reflexive realities and do not fall within the domain of objective realities which are amenable to purely scientific understandings, manipulations and controls. Our highly respected religious ways of dealing with many aspects of our relationships with each other are also impotent (powerless) because they also call upon us to deal with each other in ways which depend greatly upon making judgements upon the basis of objective evidence and considerations. It is not a simple matter to do justice, love, mercy and walk humbly with God and each other --- while we are preoccupied with objective understandings, manipulations, and controls --- which tempt us with trying to be in control of many realities which are not ours to control and which we cannot have the power to control. In such matters we are prone to play collusive games of mutual self-deception about what our rights, powers and responsibilities are. Human efforts are usually disintegrative when they entail: DISHONESTY COERCION VIOLENCE THREATS COLLUSIONS ADDICTIONS CODEPENDENCE ARROGANCE PRETENSIONS ALIENATION ANGER REVENGE REPRESSIONS SUPPRESIONS IMBALANCE WARS To act wisely in integrative ways we need to deal openly and honestly with the disintegrative patterns of behavior indicated above. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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