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%AVOIDING CONFLICT RESOLUTION 780314
The source of conflict is often the exclusivity of
different people's affirmations of genuinely positive
values. Examination will show that the values all merit
affirmation within appropriate contexts; none of the
conflicting values is essentially evil. Conflict
originates in the affirmation of positive values outside
the range of their propriety; e.g., objectivity within
intimate personal relationships. Such inappropriate
affirmations are occasioned by affirming a value to be of
ultimate importance; i.e., it's range of propriety is
unlimited. No two different values are likely to call for
exactly the same response in all possible different
situations. If value "A" and value "B" are both presumed
to have unlimited ranges of propriety, they are very
likely to occasion conflict in some situation by calling
for mutually exclusive responses. Thus, conflict is
occasioned by an attempt to affirm the values as of
ultimate importance in all possible situations---by the
exclusivity of their claims upon ultimate concern.
People who have dedicated their lives to the
exclusive affirmation of certain values become soldiers in
the conflicts occasioned by their affirmations outside the
range of propriety. If they are ultimately concerned with
affirming their priority values within all possible
different situation, they will seek to undermine
meditation/meditation which might resolve conflicts by
revealing situations within which particular values are
inappropriate---they will seek to avoid conflict
resolution. Only through continued conflict will they be
able to continue to affirm the ultimate importance of
their priority values within all possible situations. If
each of the participants to a conflict is affirming the
ultimate importance of one or more priority values, then
none of the participants will with integrity seek conflict
resolution---and all will be motivated by their dedication
to continue the conflict, in order to continue to be
faithful servants of their idolatrous values, in terms of
which their life has meaning, direction, purpose, energy,
beginning, and consummation. They cannot compromise.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
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(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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