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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %TRUE LOVE LEAD PEOPLE TOGETHER COOPERATE DESIRE 931117 True love leads people to find new ways to be together in cooperative ventures which fulfill their most integrative desires. In true love people become aware of, sensitive to and responsive to each other's most intimate and personal desires. True love is not narrowly focused upon objective goals, ideals, values, criteria, relationships, procedures, processes, accomplishments, or judgements. True love is meaningfully interested in reflexive realities and relationships. True love cannot be proven to be what it is through scientific procedures, for it cannot be properly subjected to the objective procedures and analyses which are the preoccupations of scientists. Thus quantitative measurements, the gathering of quantitative data and the statistical analysis of such measurements are not appropriate means to the honest verification of the nature of what some people claim is true love, but which other people doubt is true love. When the natures of intimate relationships between people are in doubt scientific procedures cannot be used to settle the doubts of the people who question the natures of the intimate relationships. True insights into the nature of questionable relationships are not promoted through preoccupations with demands for proofs which will satisfy skeptics, doubters, and cynics. Such demands are more likely to promote personal and communal disintegration than they are likely to promote true mutual understanding, insights and cooperation. Seeking insights into the nature of questionable personal relationships is not an objective process, cannot be carried out in an objective way, and has reflexive consequences whenever it is attempted. Seeking such insights in objective ways is bound to be more disintegrative than integrative. It is more honest and integrative to seek such insights with full recognition and acknowledgement that such seeking is inherently a reflexive process. Then it is possible to enter into the process in ways which are inherently integrative and which may change the truth in the process of seeking the truth. Questionable relationships may become worthy of respect in the process of seeking to understand them and be informed about the nature of the relationships. There can with integrity be more interest in what the relationship becomes while trying to understand the relationship and the participants within it, than there is interest in proving what the relationship was before the details of the relationships became known. The focus can with integrity be more upon evolving possibilities than upon past realities. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================