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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %PERSONAL COMMUNAL HEALTH NEED SECURE CONTEXT JOY+930216 %DICHOTOMY HONEST IDEAL VALUE SELF EXPECT REJECT+930216 %FUNDAMENTAL CONFLICT UNDERSTAND DIALOGUE CONVERSE 930218 Our dichotomies are rooted in our dishonest ideals, values, and self expectations. Our dichotomies are related to our addictions, codependencies, collusions and false self expectations---since they lead to incoherence. Often we fall into the trap of exclusive ideals: for one ideal to be good we believe that a complimentary ideal which is unlike the "good" one must be bad or evil. We fall into the trap of believing that all "good" things must be alike; and "evil" things must be alike in contrast to "good" things. To be "good" people we must be in control of making all things be like our "good" things. This is addictive thinking. Dichotomies are often manifested in addictive thinking and addictive attempts to be in control. People who are trapped in addictive attitudes and thinking patterns rarely honestly seek to resolve conflicts. They often seek to heighten the differences between people who are in conflict---by drawing more sharply the distinctions, and by making more important the sharply drawing of the distinctions. They want to be different from the other people whom they regard as "evil" people. To be "good" people, they feel that they must clearly be different from the other people who are "evil" people. Thus people who are trapped in addictive attitudes and thinking patterns become involved in fundamentalist movements which claim to be returning to the most basic fundamentals of their heritage. Fundamentalists are selective in choosing which fundamentals to return to; they focus upon ideals, values, and goals which will heighten the difference between them and the "evil" people whom they perceive to be the ultimate threat to them. Their ultimate concern is the mounting of an ultimate defense against those people whom they perceive to be their ultimate threat. In the idolatrous service of their ultimate concern they are willing to sacrifice all possibilities of mutual dialogue, conversations, understanding, and cooperation. They become idolaters who worship false gods through collusive patterns of addictive and codependent behavior. Fundamentalists do not seek to resolve conflicts or dichotomies; they seek to heighten them in defensive manipulations of the truth about themselves and others. They do not want to know the truth about themselves or others. They want to achieve security through defensive manipulations. We need to recognize and deal with the similarities in the behavior patterns of fundamentalists, dichotomous thinkers, addicts, codependents and other forms of collusive thinkers. Such patterns are masked in many different ways to keep us confused and unable to cope effectively with the dilemmas and tragedies which they present to us. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================