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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9105261.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %FIND WAY FREE ENJOY CONFLICT RESOLUTION TRUTH LIFE 910526 Finding enjoyment, pleasure, happiness, etc. in life is not a technical procedure in response to a technical problem. People who go through technical procedures in efforts to find enjoyment, pleasure, happiness, etc. in life are rarely genuinely successful in their efforts. To enjoy life's pleasures and happiness we must be set free to do so, else there may be little joy, enjoyment or pleasure in achieving the technical conditions which we envision as being essential to joy, enjoyment and pleasure. Unless we are set free to enjoy life's pleasures and happiness we may be inhibited from doing so even if the desired technical conditions are given to us as gifts by others as acts of love or of self-interest. We may be inhibited from enjoying life's pleasures and happiness due to the paradigm within which we life, the attitudes which we carry through life, and the mind-set with which we approach people, situations and relationships. The essence of enjoyment is not found in objective situations, relationships or realities. The essence of enjoyment entails essential reflexive relationships within the context of particular objective situations. To ignore the essential reflexive relationships is to undermine the possibility of authentic enjoyment. Authentic enjoyment cannot be sustained within dishonest contexts; e.g., within the context of collusive games of mutual self deception which are played by addicts and codependents within their kinds of organizations, societies, professions and families. The tension of trying to maintain the false appearances of such games undermines the possibility of authentic enjoyment which requires the freedom to relax. People who are playing collusive games of mutual self deception are not free to relax and enjoy life; they must constantly be on guard, defensive. The way to authentic enjoyment is the way of conflict resolution, for through conflict resolution we may find the way to be free to relax. Through conflict resolution we may transcend our games of mutual self deception which undermine our possibility of relaxation and enjoyment. The way is not easy. The way involves taking risks in making changes which appear dangerous to participants in collusive games of mutual self deception. The way may appear to lead to hell, rather than to heave. Yet an honest examination of those who are on the way will reveal that it is the way to the truth and the life which can be enjoyed authentically. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================