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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9006191.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %HEALTHY ADDICT CODEPEND NEED DESIRE DRIVE MOTIVE 900619 It is important to distinguish between healthy traits and addictive/codependent traits such as: needs, drives, desires, motivations, emotions, attitudes, logic and reasoning. In a society which has become addictive in systemic ways it is difficult for members of the society to make such important distinctions between healthy and addictive/codependent traits. The addictive/codependent traits appears to be normal in a systematically addictive society. Political leaders and the leaders in universities, colleges, schools, and churches are often prone to demonstrate the central characteristics of addicts pertaining to control, manipulation, dishonesty, dualism, confusion, forgetfulness, etc. In the extreme cases addictive and/or codependent leaders become dictators/tyrants who may be malicious or paternalistic, and may or may not lead their nation into the extreme violence of military war or economic domination without respect for personal and communal integrity. In each such case it is important not to get compulsively engaged in the conflicts of the addicts and the codependents; and if involved, to detach as creatively as possible. Any preoccupation with the games of mutual self deception and manipulation of the addicts and codependents leads to becoming like them; even if the effort is an effort to defeat them at their own games by playing their game better than they do. To play their games in an effort to defeat them is to become like them. They cannot be defeated through the use of dishonesty, violence, coercion, manipulation, or any form of technology. Their games can be transcended through following the ways of various twelve step recovery programs by which we may detach from the ways of addicts and codependents. Such creative ways lead to reconciliation of conflicts and people, not to winning of battles which lead to the continuation of the conflicts, of which the present battles are but passing episodes. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================