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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %SEX SIN TABOO COLLUSION GUILT ALIENATE VIOLENCE 890120 If the approach to sexual experiences is lead by taboos, collusions, guilt and shame; the consequence is alienation and violence. Sexual experiences are lead by the attitudes and concepts with which they are approached. Sexual experiences are not objective realities which exist independently of the participants in the experiences. It is collusively dishonest to treat sexual experiences as objective realities which are independent of the approach of those who consider them. The traditional scientific approach is not an integrative approach to sexuality; it will not lead to understanding in the realm of sexual experiences. Scientific understanding is dominated by efforts to understand, predict and control. An integrative understanding of sexual experiences is not characterized by efforts to predict and control sexual experiences. The nature of the understanding and the import of the understanding is different. If the approach to sexual experiences is lead by efforts to predict and control sexual experiences then taboos, collusions and guilt are the consequences, and they lead towards alienation and violence. If the approach to sexual experiences is lead by honest and thoughtful considerations of personal and communal integrity, then it is possible that sexual experiences will become integrative experiences which are the foundations for personal and communal integrity. Sexuality is fundamentally integrative; but when sexuality is lead by efforts to predict and control through the actions of collusions, taboos and guilt; then the experiences of sexuality all too often become alienative, violent and disintegrative. If the approach to sexuality leads people to regard sexuality as sinful, evil, bad, questionable, etc. then there are tendencies to play collusive games of mutual self deception regarding sexual experiences. Given that approach, honesty is difficult if not impossible. Given that approach there tends to be a preoccupation with pejorative labels which are alienative. That approach undermines honest considerations of personal and communal integrity and it becomes difficult for sexual experiences to be integrative experiences. Given that approach sexual experiences tend to become disintegrative. The nature of sexuality depends greatly upon the spirit in which sexual experiences are approached and understood. If sexuality is approached prayerfully, it takes on an integrative nature. If sexuality is approached without prayer, it takes on a dis-integrative nature. Sexuality is not an objective reality which is independent of the nature of the approach to it. It is dishonest to overtly or tacitly pretend otherwise in approaching sexuality. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================