This-essay is a8512152.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %LETTING GO INTO RELATIONSHIP 851215 Neither the inside nor the outside of a house is any more real than the other. So also, neither the inside nor the outside of a personal relationship is any more real than the other. To regard one as more real than the other in any case is to participate in a biased relationship to the house or personal relationship, to know bias from the inside of a biased relationship. The exclusion of one kind of perception out of the conviction that it is inferior to a completely true contrasting kind of perception is to participate in a biased relationship from the inside rather than to view such a biased relationship from the outside in an objective way which reveals its bias. To perceive a house from the inside it is necessary to go inside the house. No amount of examination of a house from the outside will give an accurate impression of what it is like to be inside the house. To perceive what it is like to be a participant in an intimate personal relationship it is necessary to let go and get inside a personal relationship in an intimate way. No amount of objective study of intimate relationships from the outside of such relationships will give an accurate impression of what it is like to be involved in them. Neither inside nor outside knowledge can substitute for the other, they are complementary and may compliment each other. It is impossible to know what it is like to surrender control of a relationship and participate intimately in its creative aspects without surrendering control, without getting inside. Extensive study from outside the house will not reveal what it is like to live inside the house; and what it is like to live inside the house depends on far more than upon the inside of the house, much less upon what the outside of the house is. The nature of personal relationships depends upon the nature of the participants and upon how they enter into the relationships. If all participants try to participate in the relationships from outside the relationships as if outside of them then the relationships will lack intimacy and personal meaning, even if all participants fully understand and can control what is happening and can accurately predict the future course of the relationship. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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