This-essay is a7907121.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %ADDICTION TO SUCCESS CONFORM ULTIMATE ADDICT GAMES+790712 %ROLES PLAYS ACT PLOT EXPECTATION ACCOMPLISH 790712 As children we are taught to succeed. We are taught what we should try to accomplish, but even more deeply we are taught that the question, "What should I try to accomplish?" is of ultimate importance. By being given the answer to the question and being given it in an ethos of ultimate concern---we are taught that the question is of ultimate importance. If we find ourself in a situation in which there are no ready answers to the question---we feel impelled to ask the question with ultimate concern. We can not enjoy the freedom and freshness of a situation which is not loaded with expectation, with definitions of what we should be doing. If there are no expectation defined for us, we go in search of expectations---and may even define them for ourselves in order that we may be successful at fulfilling expectations. Our need for success becomes an acquired addiction. Just as the heroin addict is introduced to heroin and acquires an addiction to heroin, we are introduced to social stroking upon fulfilling expectations (being successful) and become addicted to social stroking upon fulfilling expectations. Even further, we become addicted to the process of striving towards the fulfillment of expectations and being successful in fulfilling them--- even in instances in which there is little social stroking. We become addicted to conformal behavior and feel very threatened in situations in which there is no definition of what is expected. We are like the heroin addict in the absence of heroin when in need of heroin. But the heroin addict can not create the heroin to meet his need, and we can. We can invent expectations to meet our need for expectations---and so satisfy our craving, to meet the need defined by our addiction. We can not get along without expectations and the hope for future success in fulfilling such expectations. Like the heroin addict, we sacrifice personal integrity in frantic efforts to acquire that which will fill the desire within us---in our instance an ultimate desire to have expectations to fill our emptiness and define our identity. If others will not provide the expectations, we create them for ourselves by playing the role to ourselves which others will not play for us---to meet our need for expectations. We do other's job because they won't. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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