This-essay is a7711193.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %TALKING ABOUT LOVE 771119 People who are exclusively verbally oriented tend to try to control affective communications motivated by love---but they fail. By limiting them-selves to verbal communications they make it impossible to deal meaningfully with the essence of love's non-verbal communications. They are about as successful as a musician who tries to teach mathematics via the performance of musical compositions. Verbal languages can not adequately communicate the essential aspects of affective communications with their varying colors of sexual meaning. Thus, talking about love rarely successfully communicates what is important about love relationships because the communications about love are not in the language of love. In such instance talking about love may be violent, in the sense that such talk violates the love relationship. Such violence is relatively evident in the case of malicious gossip, and even in the case of "innocent" gossip. The reality of such verbal violence is not so evident in intellectual, rational, logical, analytic, scientific discussions of love and its expressions. Objective analyses of love tend to violate love relationships because the objective technologies and languages are inappropriate tools for developing an understanding of the meaning of love. Objectively requires a separation between the knower and the object of knowledge. Love requires a union between THE knower and the subject of knowledge. It is a contradiction of methodology to try to objectively know the nature of love, or to talk objectively about the nature of love and its expressions. That contradiction is not removed by the development of sophisticated jargon, models, languages, analytic tools, and professional institutions. The knowledge of love comes through participation in non-objective ventures which involve risk, vulnerability, balance, trust, ambiguity, uncertainty, loss of control, and other considerations which are very threatening to exclusively objectively and verbally oriented people. Talking does not transmit such knowledge. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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