blog traffic analysis
This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ==========================================================

=====> See what editing of this essay will come later. <======

%BEST FRIEND INTIMACY RELATIONSHIPS CIRCUMSTANCES+040208 %NEW LEVELS KINDS OPEN HONEST RELIABLY ANTICIPATE+040208 %PREDICT CONTROL DOMINATE RESULTS CONSEQUENCES SEX+040208 %SIN DEVILS FAMILY FRIENDS ASSOCIATES CHURCHES GOD+040208 %ALIENATION ESTRANGEMENT IGNORANCE DIALOGUE FALLEN+040208 %MARRIAGE COVENANT PROMISE UNILATERAL SUCCESS GOOD 040208 Not even under the best of circumstances, and not even for the best of friends, can those who become involved in new levels and kinds of open and honest intimacy --- reliably anticipate, predict or control the results of those new levels and kinds of intimacy for themselves, their families and their friends. The more domineering that people are --- the more likely it is that they will believe, think and feel sure that they can be in control of the results of any new levels and kinds of intimacy which they choose to engage in unilaterally. They specialize in domination and control! They are experts at domination and control! The more domineering that people are --- the less likely it is that they will be well informed about the natures of their present "friendships", "intimacies", "loyalties" and personal "relationships". Because of their alienations they do not have, and cannot acquire, the intimate knowledge which is needed to reliably anticipate, predict or control the course of evolution of any of their "personal relationships". Not even True Lovers can be sure that they know enough to reliably anticipate, predict or control the course of evolution of their own personal relationships and intimacies. All humans have limitations. In the sense of modern "Chaos Theory" (which has grown out of the study of "the weather" and nearly periodic cyclic- processes such as dripping water, heart beats and breaking ocean waves) the cycles of human relationships are chaotic processes which cannot be predicted very far into the future. Uncertainties about the beginning conditions of all of the relevant relationships make it impossible to predict the future at all well for at all far into the future. People who participate openly and honestly in human relationships --- are often fundamentally changed by their participations --- and so their relationships are changed in ways which they cannot predict or control. It is dishonest to pretend otherwise and to make promises which cannot be kept. True Lovers do, however, enter into meaningful and integrative covenants which do not entail domination and/or control. They learn to rely on each other and to trust each other to respond to each other's changes --- in ways which are balanced and mutually meaningful in gracious ways. They cooperate in resolving conflicts and misunderstandings thorough open and honest dialogue and intimacies --- without anybody trying to be dominant or be in control of outcomes. They do not try to conform themselves, each other, or their relationships to any pre- conceived ideal forms. They do not demand that there be any such process of conforming to any "ideal forms". (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================