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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9511271.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ADDICTIVE CONTROL DESIRE LAW RULE REGULATE LOVE+951127 %PRESCRIBE PROSCRIBE FORBID REQUIRE DEMAND ALWAYS 951127 Often undisciplined attempts to satisfy human desires are not worthy of respect or support. Often attempts to satisfy human desires lead to personal and communal disintegration. Thus, it is prudent to guide active expressions of human desires by promoting respect and support for integrative ideals, values and principles. However, it is often unwise to try to suppress talking about certain kinds of desires---even when active talking about them are highly likely to be disintegrative. Talking about desires and actively expressing desires through actions intended to fulfill the desires---are quite different behaviors, and need to be dealt with as quite different behaviors. We and others who are preoccupied with issues of control are bound to try to manipulate each other in coercive and violent ways in our efforts to be totally in control on our own terms. If we are preoccupied with issues of control we do not dare to be engaged fully in cooperative ventures---for cooperation makes us vulnerable in ways which undermine our possibilities of being fully in control. If we are preoccupied with issues of control we cannot cooperate in conflict resolution efforts---for all true conflict resolution entails openness and honesty about our needs, fears, desires, hopes and aspiration--- and so entails vulnerability and letting go of preoccupations with issues of control. If we are preoccupied with issues of control we cannot be peacemakers---for peacemaking entails conflict resolution which is impossible for people who are preoccupied with issues of control. If we are preoccupied with issues of control we are dammed to hellish lives of conflict, coercion, dishonesty, alienation, violence, anger, resentment, depression and hopelessness. If we are preoccupied with issues of control we need to consider carefully the price we are paying for our continued preoccupation with issues of control; let go of such futile preoccupations---and take some new risks which are unlikely to lead to the great sacrifices of our preoccupation with issues of control. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================