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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9212231.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %REGARD CONSIDER THINK OWN EMOTIONS OBJECTIVELY+921223 %TALK CONVERSATION DIALOGUE COMMUNICATE ARTICULATE+921223 %WISE CONFLICT RESOLUTION HONEST INTEGRITY LOVE 921223 We cannot regard, think about, or talk about our own emotions objectively; for doing so is an essentially reflexive process. If we are compulsively objective in our considerations of all that we do consider; then we are not likely to be free to regard, think about, or talk about our own emotions; and are likely to neglect, repress, forget, gloss over, hide and otherwise deny our own emotions. If the community of those people who are most important to us in maintaining our self esteem are compulsively objective in their consideration of all that they do consider; then we are not likely to be free with them to regard, think about, or talk about our own emotions. If we are not free with them to consider our own emotions---then we are not likely to be free apart from them to consider our own emotions; for they (both our emotions and our primary other people) are eternally present in our consideration of our self esteem. Our freedoms are culturally conditioned to a very large extent, but not totally. To deal wisely with our emotions we need to be free to regard them, think about them, and talk about them with each other---openly, honestly, matter of factly, clearly, without embarrassment or fear of rejection. This is nearly impossible for us to do if we are trapped in a collusive community which places exclusive emphasis upon objectivity, measurement, computation, manipulation, prediction, control, discipline, and management. In such a community openness and honesty about emotions must be taboo, to protect the collusive games of mutual self deception which are the essence of the community. If we are not free to talk about our own or other people's emotions; then we are not free to be true to ourselves or to others, and so cannot enjoy personal or communal integrity. Then we cannot deal with our dilemmas, conflicts, and problems in an informed and wise way; because we cannot be well informed in the absence of the freedom to talk openly and honestly. We cannot understand others or our conflicts with others in the absence of knowing about and understanding our own and their emotions; and so we cannot creatively resolve our conflicts in the absence of the freedom to be open and honest with each other about our emotions. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================