blog traffic analysis
This is http://www.essayz.com/a9108271.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ATTEMPT CONTROL OTHER PERSON RELATIONSHIP SELF 910827 Any attempt to control the thoughts, feelings, expressions and/or behaviors of another person are based upon a superficial understanding of the nature of people, and of the relationships among people. It is impossible to attempt to control another person without thereby affecting the relationship with that other person. The attempt to control will affect the relationship. We cannot relate to another person without affecting our relationship with the other person. People do not exist independently of their relationships with each other. Thus it is impossible to control another person without controlling our relationship with the other person. However, our relationship with another person is influenced by: the other person's responses, the other person's friends and relatives, our friends and relatives, and governmental actions. We cannot control all that may influence our relationship, and so we cannot control the relationship. We cannot control our relationship with another person apart from controlling our own behavior in keeping with our theory of how our behavior will affect our relationship, the other person, and all the other persons who may influence our relationship. If our theory is inadequate, our efforts to achieve control will fail. If we do not know thoroughly another person (and their social context) well through an open and honest intimate relationships with the other person, we do not have a firm foundation for predicting how the other person (and their social context) will respond to some change in our pattern of behavior; we will not be reliably informed, and will have no basis for making informed decisions. If the other person has not informed us, or has mislead us; then we cannot know all that we would need to know to be sure of what we should do to get the other person to do what we want them to do. If we think that the other person (and their social context) will respond to our actions as we would respond to the same actions, then we are fools; and fools do not succeed in achieving what they intend to achieve, assuming they have clear intentions. If we let other people control us, out of a desire to endear ourselves to them; we will find that neither they nor we are in control of what is happening to us and our relationship. We will be the victims of the disintegrative assumptions, attitudes and beliefs which lead us to participate dishonestly in a passive/aggressive violent relationship. We will be controlled by our disintegrative assumptions, attitudes and beliefs; and will not be able to be honest with ourselves or with others about what it is that is controlling us all. We will be in prisons of our own making, and unable to see how to get out through the open door which we think is locked. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================