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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %TRUE LOVERS ELICIT EXPRESSION FEAR FEELING DESIRE 910427 True lovers elicit from each other open and honest expressions of each other's true fears, feelings and desires. True lovers offer each other a secure context in which they may be vulnerable in expressing their true fears, feelings and desires. True lovers are not demanding or defensive in ways which occasion the hiding of fears, feelings and desires. They do not seek to manipulate, control, manage, regulate, change, or improve each other according to their own particular conceptions of what is desirable, proper, correct, acceptable or right. They seek to know each other honestly and seek to be known honestly. True lovers do not confuse mutual dishonest addictive dependence with healthy honest inter- dependence. True lovers seek the truth with each other; they do not hide the truth from themselves and each other. True lovers are not preoccupied with treating their dilemmas as if their dilemmas were technical problems which could be solved with the correct fix. They do not try to fix themselves or each other to satisfy themselves or each other as being acceptable. True loves accept themselves and each other as worthy of open and honest dialogue, as they are without any fixing. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================