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  %ACHIEVE IGNORANCE ENTROPY CONFUSE SALVATION LOVE 910418

     When  we   try  to  achieve  our  own   salvation  in
isolation  through  ignorance  of  taboo  experiences---we
imprison   ourselves   in  double  bind   strange   loops,
perpetuation    of  embarrassment,      alienation    from
knowledge  of   our   true selves and  each  other,    and
dishonest  games  of mutual self deception.     We   force
ourselves  and each  other  to  hide within ourselves  our
confusion,   disorder,  disintegration and  other forms of
entropy.    We keep out those  forms  of personal   energy
through  which  we  might  enjoy  integration;   and   the
elimination of our confusion,  disorder and other forms of
entropy.

     When  we  feel  that we are not free  to  acknowledge
our ignorance,  our mistakes, our confusion,  our tension,
our  conflicts  and  our entropy---we feel we  must   keep
them bottled  up inside our selves;   we cannot let go  of
them,  for fear that we would reveal that they were inside
of   us where they "should not be".  In fear of  revealing
that they were inside of us where they "should not be", we
keep  them inside  of our selves where we feel  that  they
"should  not be".  It is a strange reflexive loop by which
we  embarrass our  ability to do deal with our  ignorance,
confusion and conflicts.

     Pretending  to  be ignorant of experiences  which  we
feel  we should  not  know  about,  keeps  us  from  truly
knowing  ourselves   and   taking  advantage of  our   own
instinctive wisdom.

     Pretending that  all  wisdom  comes  from  outside of
ourselves  causes   us to bottle up inside  ourselves  the
wisdom   which  is inherent in our being our  true  unique
selves.    In  such bottling up we confuse our selves  and
each other,  and keep inside ourselves the entropy of  our
confusion;   and we are not  free to use our own  personal
energies  to  re-order  our  assumptions,     perceptions,
thinking,     feeling,affection,    conversations,     and
experiences.

     If  we  are  not  free  to  confess  our experiences,
knowledge, conflicts,   confusion,  ignorance,   mistakes,
fears  and entropic aspects;   we keep them bottled inside
of  us  where  they    generate    disintegration    which
spills    out    at inopportune  moments  and   tragically
leads   to  communal disintegration.    We  then are  kept
from   cooperating   in  sorting   out   the   differences
between    integration   and  disintegration,      between
integrity and disease,   between salvation  and damnation.
In  our  mutual ignorance of  our selves  and  each  other
there  is no health in us,   and we do not  know where  to
seek  integrity.    In  our confusion we do not   dare  to
believe that the keys we seek,   are inside us within  our
confusion  which  we do  not  dare  admit  to ourselves or
others,   because we do not dare let go of any of  it  and
so  let it become known outside of  our  selves that  such
knowledge and confusion has been inside of  us. We  go  in
strange  loops which bind us  together  in  our  collusive
prisons of mutual self deception.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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