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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %HEALTHY SEX RELATION FULFILL PLAN SYSTEM PRESCRIBE 910303 Healthy sexual relationships are not fulfilled under the control of a systematic plan, procedure, prescription, or set of expectations. Healthy sexual relationships are fulfilled through motivations and desires which are not controlled by any systematic plans, procedures, prescriptions or expectations. In healthy sexual relationships there are gentle considerations which transcend the driving motivations and which give them appropriate direction, but such considerations do not motivate the fulfillment of sexual relationships. Any effort to put such considerations in control, according to some systematic plan, procedure, prescriptions, set of expectations, prohibitions, or taboos---in an effort to assure the fulfillment of healthy sexual relationships--- will be frustrated and will be frustrating efforts. People who are compulsively preoccupied with issues of control are unlikely to respect the healthy fulfillment of healthy sexual relationships---because the issue of control is not central in such fulfillment. The absence of preoccupation with control will be perceived by them as an indication of a loss of control which is not worthy of respect, and as very dangerous, because of the lack of appropriate control. All good things must be done under appropriate control, and sexual relationships are no exception. To be "good" sexual relationships must be fulfilled under proper guidance and control; else they are "evil". People who let go and let themselves enjoy themselves without proper control, must be evil people and unworthy of respect. To be truly loving sex must be controlled in accordance to a systematic plan, procedure, prescription, set of expectations and with respect for all relevant taboos and prohibitions. It is evil to talk to anybody whose experiences suggest otherwise, for they must be agents of the devil and to be avoided at all costs--- including at the costs of alienation, estrangement, misunderstanding and ignorance. Control is not the key to healthy sexuality, and is often the death of healthy sexuality. Healthy sexual relationship involve people knowing their own feelings openly and honestly, and sharing them with another who willingly enters into a balance and sharing relationship of mutual concern and caring. Healthy intimacy is not coercive or manipulative in presumptuous or imposing ways; it is honest, revealing, gentle, balanced, spontaneous, imaginative, and creative. Within healthy sexual relationships people discover themselves and each other, and are reborn in creative new ways which involve change and transformations which are not under any one person's or persons' control. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================