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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9011162.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %DESIRE SEEK MUTUAL VULNERABILITY SECURITY RELATION 901116 Our personal relationships are more likely to be healthy and we are more likely to be healthy, if we seek relationships of mutual vulnerability and security, than if we seek to achieve security through invulnerability. If we approach each other seeking to identify points of vulnerability which we can take advantage of, then we become mutually defensive and suspicious. The tensions and conflicts which result undermine our health. It is unhealthy to try to take advantage of each other. If we expect to achieve security through invulnerability we approach each other with a confused set of concepts and we cannot see each other clearly; our perceptions are confused by our confused concepts. Real security is the freedom to know each other openly and honestly in relationships of mutual vulnerability. False security is dishonest and unstable; not worthy of our respect, desire, or seeking. We need to seek personal relationships of mutual desire for mutual vulnerability and mutual security; in which our fulfillment comes from our being together in mutual cooperation, not from being competitive in calculated moves which are offensive and alienative, because they are motivated by mutual defensive fears. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================