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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9005254.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %PARTICIPATE CONFRONT OTHER DISHONEST ADDICTION JOY 900525 We cannot participate joyfully in others' dishonest behavior led by addictive attitudes. We cannot prevent others from engaging in dishonest behavior which is led by addictive attitudes. If we try to prevent dishonest behavior we get dragged into dishonest behavior; for trying to prevent specific human behaviors is manipulative behavior; and dishonest behavior is the most common form of manipulative behavior. Trying to make other people be good people is essentially manipulative behavior. To the extent which we are totally dedicated to making other people into good people, we will be willing to use all available tools of manipulation in our efforts. In our dedication we become willing to use dishonesty as a tool of manipulation; and so become like the dishonestly manipulative people we are trying to make into good people. We cannot achieve our salvation by working to make other people into good people. No one is saved by manipulative behavior; neither the manipulated, nor the manipulators. People are essentially free creatures. People respond to manipulations in ways which evade the intent of the manipulators. Manipulators plan their manipulations with the expectation that the manipulated people will respond to the manipulations in some intended way. Manipulated people in some dim way understand the intent of the manipulation, and declare their freedom by behaving in ways other than those which were intended, even if the intended behavior would have been in their best interest in the absence of the manipulation. Trying to make people be good usually leads to estrangement and disintegration. Seeking to be in open and honest dialogue with people as they really are, leads to cooperation and to personal and communal integrity. If we fail to confront others' dishonest behavior with honest responses, we are likely to get dragged into their patterns of dishonesty. Failing to respond honestly to their dishonest behavior is likely to entail tacit support of their dishonesty. Honest responses can be offered with love and charity which have the power to set people free to be honest with themselves, and with others. Failing to respond honestly helps them dig themselves deeper and deeper into their prison of dishonesty, wherein they are so confused that they cannot see their dishonest behaviors which are the walls of the prison they have built around themselves. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================