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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9005241.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %SEEK FIND ROOT UNHAPPY DISHONEST VIOLENCE SELF JOY 900524 If we honestly seek we shall find the roots of our unhappy violence and disintegration in our dishonesty with self and others about our perceptions of our experiences, emotions, thoughts, communications and behaviors. If we do not honestly seek, we shall continue to be unhappy in our violent disintegrations. We cannot be honest with others unless we are honest with ourselves about our experiences, emotions, perceptions, thoughts, communications and behaviors. If we are not honest, we lack integrity and joy. The community whose members are not honest with themselves and others lacks communal integrity and joy; no matter what other powers, sophistication and technical advantages it may have. For us to enjoy personal and communal integrity it is essential that we elicit from each other that which is honestly real in each other as regards our: experiences, emotions, perceptions, thoughts, communications and behaviors. When that which is real in us is repressed within us, through fear of honest disclosure; the pressure within us to disclose that which is real within us builds up, and finds violent ways of breaking out in destructive confusion and acting-out-behaviors. Liberal education is the process of honest educement; the eliciting of honest revelations of that which is real within us. Real education is the elicitation of honesty through the gift of security which is the freedom to be honestly vulnerable. Real education is liberation because it occurs within secure contexts where we may be honestly secure; rather than dishonestly defensive. Real education does not occur in highly controlled contexts because the imposition of external controls and expectations occasions dishonesty with and in others; and with and in self---and so again with endless echoes. Attempts to achieve satisfaction through successful control of self and others leads to dis-integration and dis-satisfaction because such efforts occasion dishonesty. We cannot honestly control perceptions of our: experiences, emotions, thoughts, communications and behaviors; although we may honestly influence them all. When we try to control what cannot be honestly controlled we often achieve an impression of control by pretending to achieve what we seek to achieve. Others may help us in our pretentious behavior by pretending to be more fully controlled than they really are. In both cases the apparent achievement is the fruit of dishonesty; it is not real, and leads to personal and communal disintegration. We are sick if we cannot be honest with ourselves and others about our desires, fears, pleasures, pains, hopes, and aspirations. Many of our sicknesses are rooted in our not being free to be honest. Our addictions are dishonest efforts to compensate for our lack of freedom to be open and honest with our selves and with each other. We cannot honestly say no to our dishonest fixes; just as we have not honestly said no to dishonest demands which have lead us to repress open and honest expressions of who we really feel ourselves to be. We cannot honestly promote each other's pleasure if we cannot be honest about what gives us pleasure and pain. Others cannot promote our pleasure if we cannot honestly tell them what really pleases us, and what really pains us. If our lives are full of pretense, we are bound to be pretentiously confused; while trying to pretend to be pleased. We are all very trying and unhappy; but we cannot be honest about that either. We cannot be real and honest when we are trying to conform to external definitions of who we should be. Objective definitions of who we should be are bound to lead us into dishonesty, as they are not descriptions of who we really are with all our unique "imperfections". "Spiritual objectivity" is no better than "material objectivity." "Spiritual objectivity" is a dishonest mirror image of "material objectivity." It appears to be in another better world, but the image is where we cannot be in touch with it, since it is a virtual image behind the mirror of our dishonest desires. In that mirror we see ourselves dishonestly as we pretend we would be if we were perfected according to some external definition of who we think we should be. Our thoughts are confused because we have confused our emotions through dishonest representations of ourselves. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================