blog traffic analysis
This is http://www.essayz.com/a8803231.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ATTRACTIVE RESPONSIVE DEFENSIVE SECURE PEOPLE 880323 We are attracted to people who are responsive in integrative ways. When people are not responsive we may wonder what it is that they are hiding, and suspect them and their motives. At the least we tend to feel that they are unknown, and as unknown people they can not be relied upon to behave in any known way. We are not attracted to reactive people; i.e., to people who react to what we do and say, but do not respond to us as persons engaged in dialogue. Reactive people tend not to enter into open and honest dialogue, and so we do not get to know them as people. As unknown people they can not be relied upon to behave in any known way. Responsive people tend to reveal themselves to us by how they respond to us. We get to know them as whole persons and have a sense that we can trust the whole persons whom we have come to know. They do not react in ways which signal attempts at manipulative control. Thus we do not feel a need to be defensive and are free to feel at ease, secure. Attractive people are attractive because they give us the freedom to be vulnerable in their presence; so we like to be in their presence. We are attracted to them by the security which they offer to us by being openly and honestly responsive. Attractive people are not on the defensive; not trying to achieve security through defensive maneuvers. They know security as the freedom to be safely vulnerable through the experience of that freedom. Such knowledge is not an intellectual knowledge only, it is existential knowledge born of familiarity rather than of definitions, logic and reasoning. Defensive people tend not to be attractive. They tend to scare others off and so intensify the insecurity which is manifested in their being defensive. Defensive people tend to be threatened by attractive people because attractive people undermine the logic which drives and guides defensive people, and so justifies their defensive patterns of behavior; yet miracles do happen and defensive people sometimes become responsive people. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================