This-essay is a8012113.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %LOVE'S MUTUALLY FULFILLING PLEASURES 801211 The essence of love is the desiring and offering of opportunities to participate in mutually fulfilling and pleasurable relationships among people who are or might be close to each other. Closeness may be of various forms: geographic, professional, work-place, interest, political, religious, educational, sexual etc. Love offers opportunities but does not expect or demand particular responses to the offerings; desiring authentic responses rather than conventional responses, or responses which merely fulfill expectations. The desire is a desire for mutuality in pleasurable relationships that fulfill participants' potentials in keeping with their respective desires. Some of the more common perversions of love include: seeking pleasure without mutuality, operating in terms of systematic procedures prescribed as conforming with love's commands, inflicting paternalistic care upon the "loved on", engaging in selfish pleasurable activities which mutually satisfy a small number of participants---but do not fulfill their potentials and do not respect other people's right, engaging in contractual personal relationships wherein behavior is prescribed by explicit or implicit contract which is binding, collusions by which "lovers" lose contact with reality, etc. Participants in such perverted relationships usually lack some kind of balance, and it is helpful to note what kind of balance is missing. Conformity without mutuality is not balance. Neither is mutuality without pleasure in balance. Pleasures which undermine the fulfillment of people's fundamental potentials are not balanced. The fulfillment of formal abilities without pleasure is also out of balance. No one value is valuable when it operates to the exclusion of other values. An exclusive affirmation of any value invalidates the affirmation, because of the lack of balance. Any affirmation of a value which inhibits balance, mutuality, pleasure, personal fulfillment, alternative opportunities, or dialogue is an affirmation which is self-defeating. The essence of love is the desiring and offering of opportunities to participate in mutually fulfilling and pleasurable relationships among people who are or might be close to each other. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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This-essay is a8012113.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. These 5 lines echo top lines. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One