This-essay is a7910091.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %REALIZING DEPENDENCY PERCEPTION 791009 Often perception realizes that which was not real before the perception. To perceive a reality may create that reality. A personal relationship which is not really one of dependency may be turned into a relationship of dependency by the act of perceiving it as such. Jack and Jill are intimate friends, but their relationship is not dependent in any unhealthy way. It is not possible to accurately describe their relationship without doing violence to its reality. If Jack expresses to Jill a concern, it may realize that which concerned him; it may create the dependent relationship which he feared. The indescribable relationship may be converted into a relationship which may be accurately described as one of dependency. The effort to accurately describe the relationship may create that which is described, and destroy the intimacy which could not be accurately described. Jack may have noticed that his culture connects dependency with love in the case of women. To be in a love relationship women must be dependent upon a man. Guilt is the price which women must pay for trying to escape dependency and still be fulfilled in Love according to God's will. Most men do not want women to be free in Love, and make dependency a condition for giving their love. Women are required to buy through dependency. Jack may wish to transcend the absurdities of such cultural requirements. He may express his concerns to Jill in a way which create the perception of a dependency which did not exist before he expressed his concerns. His expression of his perceptions may realize the very dependency which he wishes to escape. If Jack's problem is a double blind, consider Jill's problem. Society demands guilt for her if she wishes to escape the cultural requirements that love be bought by making dependency payments. If she expresses a concern to Jack about being dependent in a destructive way she may make real that which did not exist until she expressed her concern and in so doing offend Jack who sought to avoid making Jill dependent. To be open about her fear of being trapped in a dependency relationship is to fall into it. The triple-blind blocks dialogue. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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