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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9310092.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %HEALTHY EXPRESSION SEX NATURE RATIONAL CONTROL+931009 %EXPLICIT PURPOSE GOAL ORIENT OBJECT REFLEXIVE+931009 %DENY TRUTH PRETEND COLLUDE ADDICT CODEPENDENT 931009 Our healthiest expressions of our sexual natures in intimate sexual relationships are not: 1. Essentially rational in character. 2. Exclusively rational in character. 3. Fully under the control of our rationality. 4. Fully under the control of others' expectations. 5. Expressions of systematic plans/procedures. 6. Explicit purpose-oriented or goal-oriented. 7. Public in character. 8. Objective in nature for possible validation. 9. Fully under the control of any person or group. 10. Free of reflexive considerations. Many of our difficulties with our sexuality flow from assumptions, attitudes, beliefs and convictions which in some way deny the existential realities to which the above statements point. When we in various ways deny the existential realities to which the above statements point we undermine the possibilities of expressing our sexuality in the most integrative and healthy ways which we can imagine. When we pass judgements upon our own and other people's expressions of our and their sexuality in terms of criteria which deny the existential realities to which the above statements point---we generate rejections, excommunications, alienation, estrangement, frustration, anger, resentment, desires for revenge, and violent reactions of many forms. To be healthy and to enjoy both personal and communal integrity we need to acknowledge and accept the existential realities to which the above statements point; and avoid the acceptance of the assumptions, attitudes, beliefs and convictions which in some way deny the existential realities to which the above statements point. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================