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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %IMPOSSIBLE APPEAR CONTROL PRIVATE BEHAVIOR HONEST 920919 It is impossible to control with honesty and integrity the private behaviors of people. Attempts to control the private behaviors of people always involve dishonesty and disintegrative coercion on the part of the would-be controllers, and elicit dishonesty and disintegration on the part of the victims of the would-be controllers. Attempts to control the private behaviors of people are attempts to deny the truth of the above description; they are essentially dishonest and without integrity, and so do not merit respect or support. Usually the would-be controllers are engaged in doing more damage to personal and communal integrity than are the people whom the would- be controllers are attempting to control. The evil which is present is often rooted in their dishonesty, deception and coercion. We can describe both honestly and with charity the dynamics of the evil which is present in imperfect human relationships---without thereby being coercive or violent in attempts to control the relationships. We may reasonably hope that descriptions which are both honest and charitable may help people to see the truth about their attitudes, decisions and actions; and so help them to make wiser choices and live truer lives. But we cannot reasonably be absolutely sure of that, and cannot make absolutely sure that they will make wiser choices and live truer lives. It is dishonest to pretend that we can achieve integrative purposes through the use of disintegrative means; and it is unwise to show respect for people who engage in such dishonesty. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================