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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %REALM BEING CONSCIOUS RELATE CONNECT INTEGRITY SEX 920902 The stories of our lives include many occasions of trying to return to a former state or realm of being conscious of participation and satisfaction with wholeness, health and integrity. We sense that we have fallen from a former state or realm of being; and seek some form of: recovery, return, re-visitation, revelation, reception, repossession, regaining, retrieval, renewal, recuperation, renaissance, restoration, resumption, re- enstatement, resurgence, revival, rebirth, revivification, rekindling, resurrection, reanimation, resuscitation, or revitalization. The rich collection of re-words suggests the importance of the theme. There are many realms of being conscious of participation and satisfaction with wholeness, health and integrity; and many ways of losing that which we value. The stories of our lives deal with our efforts to regain what we feel we lost in our infancy, childhood, adolescence, or adult lives of disintegration. It is not easy to identify what it is we lost, for we do not have it; but we sense we do not have it. In our efforts to fix ourselves and/or others because of our loss---we become fixated upon fixations which do not fix; and become addicted and/or codependent in our fixations. In our efforts to regain what we have lost, and to control our having of it---we move further from enjoying it. We cannot receive it because we refuse to accept it on its own terms. We cannot recover and control what we have lost, because we and others clutched it in efforts to control it. The futility of our efforts outlines the stories of our lives. It is difficult for us to discover/create healthy ways of participation---of being whole parts of larger wholes. We too often want to be the the whole by ourselves, and in our desire to be the whole we lose the healthy wholeness which we seek to control. Our efforts to be in control of our pleasures, satisfactions, enjoyments, fulfillments, and meaningful relationships---occasion our losses of them. Having lost them, we seek to recover them in the same way we lost them; and are frustrated in our failures to succeed in the manner which we seek to succeed; because we do not Search for Integrity and Honesty in Being Ourselves, Whole and Healthy within healthy communities of integrity and balance. In seeking to find the one reality which is most important and the key to all that is worth enjoying, we lose sight of the many differing realities which are ALL ESSENTIAL to personal and communal integrity. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================