blog traffic analysis
This is http://www.essayz.com/a9109294.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %JACK FEAR OPEN HONEST INTIMATE LOVE SEX VULNERABLE 910929 Out of fear Jack avoids open and honest relationships which might lead to intimacy and sexuality which he could not fully control. Jack feels he must be in full control at all times to be respectable, proper, responsible, etc. In the past when Jack has failed to be in controlled conformity he has been abused actively and passively, made fun of, ridiculed, punished, rejected, excommunicated, shunned, dis-fellowshipped, etc. Jack is trying to avoid so being treated. Jack is being careful to avoid situations in which he fears he may not be able to be fully in control of himself, the situation and/or the relationships within which he finds himself. Jack knows that openness and honesty involve vulnerability Jack is on the defensive because of past active and passive abuses which he has experienced. Jack knows that openness and honesty are central to intimacy, and that in open and honest intimacy sexual feelings are likely to arise in uncontrolled ways; and Jack does not know how to deal with sexual feelings in open and honest ways. Because of his insecurity Jack seeks to avoid the situations which he fears; ones in which he would not know how to deal with openness, honesty, intimacy and sexual feelings which he finds he cannot control. Jack is on the defensive, and often in desperation becomes offensive to defend himself against what makes him feel insecure. Jack becomes offensive because he does not know how to be open and honest in intimate relationships which involve vulnerability and possibilities of sexuality. Because of his past experiences of passive and active abuse Jack feels he must be on the defensive against any person who tries to really get close to him in openness, honesty, authentic intimacy or integrative sexuality. Jack is protecting the collusive games of self deception he has been taught to play in his addictive and codependent society. For further thoughts see Subby's book on "Healing the Family Within" and Schaef's book on "Escape from Intimacy." (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================