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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %DEALING HONESTY EMOTIONS COLLUSION DEFENSIVE 910501 Addicts, codependents and participants in collusions have a hard time dealing with their own and other people's emotions; because emotions are expressive of inner realities which are not under the control of the addictive, codependent or collusive paradigm which controls perceptible behaviors the people. Emotions threaten to expose the lack of integrity of any imposed system which presumes to try to control people's thoughts, behaviors, desires, fears and/or feelings. Thus we try to control our emotions. Emotions cannot be controlled as readily as can verbal and overt behavioral expressions of self. Thus emotions can expose our failures to conform to whatever our paradigm and community requires of us. To deal effectively with emotions, we must be able to deal with our failures to fulfill our paradigm. If our paradigm lacks integrity, we lack integrity and our emotions expose our lack of integrity. Then we cannot with integrity deal with the fact that we lack integrity because our paradigm lacks integrity by demanding dishonesty of us. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================