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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %MORAL PERFECTION AMBIGUITY PARADOX GOOD EVIL ALIEN 900223 People who have addictive personalities tend to seek perfection of many kinds; including moral perfection. They have difficulty coping with paradoxes, ambiguity and dissonance between ideals and reality. Addictive personalities seek to put other people's lives into some kind of ideal order; according to some set of assumptions regarding morality, ethics, propriety, legality, etc. They are frustrated about their difficulties in putting their own lives in order, and project their frustrations in efforts to deal with the objective reality of other people's lives. In general it is easier to deal with objects which yield to being pushed around, than to deal with human relationships which cannot be pushed around objectively. Objects can be pushed around; relationships cannot be pushed around. We can deal with objects objectively. We cannot deal with our personal relationships objectively, we must deal with our personal relationships reflexively. There is nothing but our relationships for us to deal with; for we are in relationships even with our objects. Our objects are but abstractions of some of our relationships; useful abstractions, however. When we seek to perfect our personal relationships according to some set of pre-conceptions, we try to push our personal relationships around as if they were impersonal objects which would yield to our manipulations. Impersonal relationships, however, cannot be unilaterally manipulated because other participants are free agents who are essential participants in our personal relationships. Ethical, moral, legal, and conventional ways of manipulating human relationships are imperfect ways of coping with human relationships; because they cannot in any systematic way deal with all the paradoxes, ambiguities and incongruities which are central to all meaningful human relationships. Ethical, moral, legal and conventional ways of manipulating human relationships can be perfect in their manipulations only to the extent that they manipulate meaningless human relationships in insignificant ways. There is folly in such perfection. It does not merit respect or support. There are better ways to approach other persons with integrity. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================