blog traffic analysis
This is http://www.essayz.com/a8906273.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %BEING CONTROL PERSON PROCESS ADDICT DEPEND 890627 Jack believes he is or can be in control of some person(s) and process(es). It is worth while to consider what would be involved in being in control. To be in control would mean causing some thing/person to behave in some way which would not be the normal way for that person/thing to behave. If the thing/person were to behave normally there would be no element of control in the relationship between the controller and the controlled. To be in control would mean having some preconception of how the controller wanted the thing/person to behave, and to interact with the person/thing in such a way as to get it to behave according to the preconception. Successful control would entail achieving conformity with the preconception. Achieving such conformity would thus entail the controller behaving in some systematic way which would respond to non-conformal behavior on the part of the controlled person/thing, so as to coerce it back into the preconceived pattern of behavior. Any tendency on the part of the target of control to depart from the preconceived pattern of behavior, would elicit an appropriate counter-behavior pattern from the controller to achieve the preconceived result. Thus, it is clear that the controller would have to be totally dedicated to modifying the controllee's behavior to be responsive to non-conformal behavior on the part of the target of the effort to control. The target and the controller will thus evolve into a mirror image relationship where it will be impossible to tell the difference between roles. Each will attempt to manipulate the other, and each would be the victim of the other's manipulative efforts. Each will be controlled by a preoccupation with the other, while deceiving self into thinking that self is in control of the other. The whole process would be a collusive game of mutual self deception! In many such games of mutual self deception there may appear to be people who are in positions of dominance, and others who appear to be in positions of submission; but such appearances can be deceiving. Those who appear to be in positions of dominance are often the ones who least understand what is happening; those who appear to be in positions of submission may in humility have a pretty clear picture of what is happening. The real victims of the process are those who do not know what is really happening and thus have no hope of escaping from the prison of manipulative relationships. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================