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This is http://www.essayz.com/a8906191.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ESSENTIAL MYSTERY MIRACLE INTEGRITY ADDICT CONTROL 890619 The essential mysteries of meaningful integrative lives are offensive to people who are addicted to analysis, understanding, manipulation and control. The essence of integrative meaningful lives can not be analyzed, understood, manipulated or controlled; for the miracles which are at the heart of real living do not yield to the compulsive analysis of addicts, nor do they yield to efforts to achieve self respect through perfect control. The failure of addicts' efforts to analyze, understand, and control meaningful lives is offensive to addicts; because such failures expose the collusive dishonesty of the addicts' paradigm. Protecting that dishonesty is to them apparently essential to achieving security and meaningful fulfillment. Anyone who exposes their collusive dishonesty is a threat to their brittle sense of security. Thus it is that addicts (and those codependents who help them survive as addicts) often do not learn from the very people who are able to offer to them real help by being serene examples of living with meaningful integrity. Addicts cannot begin to travel the road to recovery from their dis-ease until they acknowledge the nature of their dilemma to themselves and to others. So long as they persist in their traditional habits of mind and heart, they are trapped in the prison made by those habits of mind and heart. To escape their prison they must make some changes in their habits of mind and heart. Change is threatening to addicts and their codependents. Any change is threatening, for their paradigm is brittle and cannot bend without breaking. There is no room for flexibility because the dishonest images of their collusions can be held together only by carefully protecting each and every carefully constructed bit of dishonesty in the puzzle. The dishonest pieces will fit together neatly in only one way. There is no room for flexibility and bending. It is a full time job to make it look like the puzzle has been put together with integrity. People who demonstrate personal integrity are a threat to the appearance of integrity in the addicts' puzzled lives. Really being present with such integrative people must be avoided at all costs, no matter how great the costs may grow to be. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================