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This is http://www.essayz.com/a8903061.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %TRAGIC IDEALS VALUES UNDERMINE PERSONAL INTEGRITY 890306 In tragic ways the ideals, values and technologies of the collusive community conspire to undermine personal integrity which might expose the games of mutual self deception which are essential to maintaining the appearance of communal integrity. In a collusive community addicts and codependents point away from themselves in ways which make themselves appear to be the center of all that they regard as real. In a similar way their misleading truths point away from themselves in ways which make the misleading pointings to become the center of people's concerns, and so worthy of the ultimate sacrifices of personal and communal integrity. Real truths can be masked so as to point away from themselves and so become misleading truths which are false to their own being. Addicts and codependents become the incarnations of such misleading truths and the defense of such misleading truths becomes their ultimate concern. Their defense is of ultimate importance because such misleading truths are ultimately vulnerable to people of integrity whose power is derived from their integrity. The misleading truths of a collusive community need a great deal of defense to survive. Their defense is ultimately very difficult because they cannot be defended truthfully with personal integrity. The defense of misleading truths must be by indirection and by misleading behaviors which make people take the misleading truths seriously. Too much coercion and people will rebel. Not enough coercion and people will not be properly misled. It is a tight-rope-walking act! The act generates much anxiety, fear, apprehension, nervousness, dis-ease, crisis and excitement! Addicts and codependents find their excitement in the defense of their misleading truths. Such defense gives meaning to their lives which would otherwise appear to be meaningless because they have been taught that they can not own their own being: their desires, fears, thoughts, feelings, opinions, etc. The roots of addiction and codependence are to be found in what children of addicts and codependents have been taught about owning their own being. Children of addicts and codependents have been taught that to be accepted they must put on an act of deception; it is not acceptable to be open and honest about their own desires, fears, thoughts, feelings, opinions, etc. They have been taught that dishonesty is a prerequisite to personal acceptance. The question of life is what techniques of dishonesty will bring the most gratifying forms of dishonest acceptance. The possibility of personal and communal integrity is unthinkable, and so not the topic of conversation which might lead to conversion and salvation; i.e., to liberation from the collusions of their addictive and codependent communities. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================