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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ATTRACTIVENESS OF INTEGRITY OPENNESS 870304 In healthy communities people of integrity are attractive because of their openness and honesty. They elicit a sense of security and willingness to be intimate in meaningful interpersonal relationships. With them there is no felt need to be defensive and keep the guard on duty. A physically pretty or handsome person may not be personally attractive for lack of personal integrity. Some communities lack communal integrity and threaten personal relationships which do have integrity. Collusive communities lack integrity; they play games of mutual self deception which threaten the integrity of intimate relationships of integrity among individuals of integrity. Collusions survive by disintegrating the integrity of people/relationships which might expose the dishonest games of mutual self deception. Thus the acknowledged communal significance of integrative personal relationships depends upon whether or not they are threatened by collusive games of mutual self deception. People of integrity may not be perceived as attractive by participants in collusive games of mutual self deception; in the extreme case, people of integrity may be perceived as evil and worthy of disintegration. On the other hand, sometimes people of integrity are perceived as owning a magical power which is coveted, and an effort is made to get and use that power in abusive ways. Integrity is perceived in a way which makes it appear to be something which can be owned and controlled to personal advantage, something which can be stolen and used without respect for what is really entailed in it. Even people who lack integrity sometimes find themselves attracted by integrity, but without a real appreciation for what it is. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================