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This is http://www.essayz.com/a8605232.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CONTROLLING DESIRES 860523 There is not much satisfaction or meaning in being able to control other people's behavior if the result is in-authentic behavior. If other people are pretending to try to be nice to you, it is pretty obvious to you that their behavior is not authentic; unless you and they are playing a game of mutual self deception which is perceived to be for mutual gain. Dictators and victims often do that. Normal people often yearn for the desire of another, but may not be able to elicit the yearned for desire. When the yearned for desire is not elicited, in frustration one may try to manipulate the other into having the desire, using subtle forms of psychological coercion and trickery. Success at such a venture does not mean the same thing as does the yearned for desire being expressed in an authentic and spontaneous way. Success in the development of the technology of psychological manipulation does not mean the same thing as joyfully letting go and being truly in Love. Being together truly in Love is not a technological success. Being in Love is a state of being and consciousness, not an accomplishment. Being in Love is not so much a mode of action as of being; from which being action flows. Action flows from being in Love. Being in Love does not flow from action, but from joyfully letting go to the presence of Love. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================