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This is http://www.essayz.com/b0211041.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ENJOY PERSONAL COMMUNAL INTEGRITIES ABSENCE LOVER+021104 %COMPLEMENTARY DISINTEGRATE FALL APART EXCLUSION+021104 %ESSENTIAL FOUNDATION PRESENCE DOMINATION ARROGANCE+021104 %SELF INTEREST SPECIAL NARCISSUS THREAT HONESTY SIN+021104 %EXPOSE DECEPTION COLLUSION LOGICAL CORRELATION GOD+021104 %PATTERNS BEHAVIORS CHARACTERISTICS ADDICTION GRACE 021104 We cannot enjoy personal and communal integrities in the absence of the integration of complementary realities. Integrity comes through the integration of complementary realities. Disintegration comes through the exclusion of complementary realities which are essential foundations for personal and communal integrities. Thus we cannot truly enjoy personal and communal integrities in the presence of domineering people who are preoccupied with excluding elements which are complementary to their own special self-centered interests. Domineering people exclude from consideration all that threatens them: honesty, creativity, authenticity, gentleness, inclusive-hospitality, non- violent-resistance, gracious-dialogue, careful-listening --- all of which threaten to expose the core pattern of dishonesty/deception upon which "The Domination System" is utterly dependent. It is helpful and important to recognize the LOGICAL CORRELATIONS between the following kinds of attitudes, thinking and behaviors: 1. Trying to dominate and/or be in control. 2. Loyal service to "The Domination System". 3. Worship of "The Powers That Be". 4. Exclusive focus upon very few ideals/values. 5. Exclusion of complementary people & ideals. 6. The use of dishonesty, coercion and violence. 7. Going to extremes as extremists/fanatics. 8. Avoidance of the threats of intimacy/honesty. 9. Avoidance of the threats of peace-makers' honesty. 10. Focusing upon individuals, not relationships. A. People who engage in the above interrelated kinds of thinking, attitudes and behaviors --- recognize and respond to each other within relationships in terms of formal arrangements; e.g., marriages which are formally recognized as legally binding, legally enforceable contracts, and people legally elected to perform the duties of formal offices. Domineering people can find ways to try to control such formal relationships. B. It is a quite different matter to recognize and appropriately respond to to each other within relationships which are characterized by: informality, openness, honesty, intimacy, friendships, cooperation, mutual-respect, balance, and sympathetic consideration for each other's: fears, anxieties, concerns, hopes, aspirations and motivations. Domineering people are frustrated by such informal relationships which are not easy to control. Attempts to control them do not "pay" well. Lovers who are involved in truly civil and authentic relationships frustrate domineering people's efforts to be in control through the use and abuse of formal relationships. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================