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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9304142.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CONTROL KINDS DIFFERENT MORAL LEGAL ETHIC RELIGION+930414 %SUPERIOR IDEALS VALUES GOOD EVIL CONTROL INTEGRITY 930414 Sometimes we may be unwillingly involved in relationships which we experience as coercive, manipulative, violent, disintegrative, etc. In other situations our involvement may be ambivalent---we may experience a frustrating mixture of advantages and disadvantages; and feel trapped in an ambiguous situation. We may not see ourselves as being free to make clear decisions among well defined alternatives---because alternatives are not evident and/or are not well defined. In situations which are healthy we may be willingly involved in integrative relationships which we create, and which create us as persons of personal and communal integrity. We create personal relationships and are created by our personal relationships. We will do well to seek to clarify what ideals, values, attitudes, and efforts lead to the creation of healthy personal relationships and participants; and what other contrasting ideals, values, attitudes and efforts lead to the creation of unhealthy relationships and participants. We will do well to note the consequences of people being preoccupied with issues of control in personal relationships: who controls whom and/or what, according to what ideals and values, in cooperation with whom, and to whose advantage and/or pleasure, etc. We will do well to note the life styles of people who are not thus preoccupied with issues of control; and consider the integrity of them as persons and of their relationships--- in contrast to the nature of the people and relationships wherein there exist compulsive preoccupations with issues of control. So long as we are preoccupied with issues of control no superior set of ideals, values or technologies will help us to transcend our disintegrative tendencies. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================