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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9112271.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CLEAR EXCLUSIVE ALTERNATE CHOICE HONEST INTEGRITY 911227 To live with integrity we must often name describe and discuss clear alternative choices among alternatives which face us. It is sometimes not clear to us which alternatives are really mutually exclusive, are choices which we can avoid making. The difference between what is possible and what is impossible as regards integrating alternative choices, is often not a clear difference; especially if we are playing collusive games of mutual self deception as do addicts and codependents. We cannot physically spend the full day on a Pacific Holiday Beach, and also at work on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange. If we are a broker who works on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, on any given day we must choose between the two places. If we pretend otherwise, we are in deep trouble! We cannot be a perfectionist who attend to every little detail, as if life depended upon every detail being perfectly in order; and at the same time live with personal integrity. If we pretend otherwise, we are in deep trouble! We cannot act as if every person with a problem whom we become aware of is a person who calls for our expert attention and skill; and at the same time live with personal integrity. If we pretend otherwise, we are in deep trouble! Clarity about alternatives is impossible without honesty about what is possible and what is impossible. If we are pretending that we are free of limits, we cannot be clear about alternatives which face us, and we cannot make wise choices between mutually exclusive alternatives. Eventually our pretense disintegrates as we disintegrate. We daily choose between pretentiousness and integrity. If we pretend otherwise, we disintegrate. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================