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This is Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %RULES HEALTHY GAME BOUNDS LIMITS ROLES SELF TRUE 910615 Each healthy game is defined by a set of rules which specify the aspects of the game: 1. The goal(s) (if any) of the game. 2. How many participants shall and/or may be on each team, and how many teams there shall and/or may be in the game? 3. The limitations (if any) on the roles which each participant shall and/or may play. 4. Limits (if any) on changes in roles that participants shall and/or may play. 5. Limits (if any) on the "playing field" in time, space, and action. 6. How the rules of the game are to be enforced, if at all. 7. What objects (if any) the participants shall and/or may use. 8. In what way(s) the participants shall and/or may use the permitted and/or required object(s). 9. The limits (if any) on the use of deception and mis-representation within the game. 10. The extent to which participants must and/or may play the role of being authentically themselves. 11. The extent to which participants must and/or may play the role of being other than who they really are as unique creatures. 12. The extent to which the rules may require people to be in-authentic; pretending to be other than who they really are as unique creatures. 13. How long participants must play in the game and/or how long they must play particular roles. 14. How thoroughly each role of each particular participant in the game is specified by the rules of the game. 15. In what ways the rules of the game shall and/or may be changed; and/or by what person or persons. 16. What limits apply to the process of changing the rules of the game. 17. How openly and clearly the rules of the game (and the changes in the rules of the game) are specified. 18. Which participants (if any) are told all the details of all the rules of the game; and which participants (if any) are kept in the dark about defined aspects of the game. 19. What are the required and/or the permitted forms of punishment to be imposed upon participants who break the rules of the game? 20. How decisions regarding whether the rules have been broken are to be arrived at: by whom and with what permitted appeals; following what procedures as to openness and process. Addictions, codependencies and collusions are games of which the following may often be truthfully said, but rarely is. They are games in which: 1. Central roles are played by personal and communal: a. Dishonesty b. Confusion c. Coercion 2. Rules are not openly and/or well defined. 3. Rules change in ill defined and/or hidden ways. 4. Fixations upon fixes are pervasive. 5. Consequences of rules and actions are obscured. 6. Techniques are worshipped and celebrated. 7. Leadership is vaguely defined in confused ways. 8. Limits are not imposed, acknowledged or honored. 9. Power is not shared with justice or love. 10. The truth is rarely spoken as the truth. 11. Participants have no real freedoms. 12. Uniqueness of participants is not valued/honored. 13. Integrity of participants is not valued/honored. 14. Transcendent values and ideals are not clarified. 15. Boundaries between participants are confused. 16. Participants play roles, not themselves. 17. Participants may not quit playing their games. 18. Participants deny they are playing their games. 19. Respectability depends upon playing their games. 20. All of these truths are unknown and/or denied. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================