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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9007282.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CHANGE PERSONAL IDENTITY BEHAVIOR FRIENDS IMAGE 900728 The insecure person does not feel safe with their own sense of identity, and is filled with fear upon any thought of change in their identity. The confusion and uncertainty of that which is familiar feels more secure than possible changes which might involve an improvement in relationships and health. There are often no clear boundaries between our behaviors and our identity. At one level we tend to think of our behaviors as being the behaviors of an unchanging person with a clear identity which does not change. We feel some sense of security in a stable unchanging identity. It is the unchanging person who engages in various behaviors. There seems to be security in personal constancy. When we have difficulties in dealing with our dilemmas we often seek to cope with the difficulties without any change in our sense of identity. We want the difficulties to be eliminated without any fundamental change in the root of our being who we are; yet, often the difficulties are rooted in our most basic attitudes, assumptions, beliefs, convictions, associations, friends, values, ideals, etc. Our most basic difficulties are rooted in who we are; our sense of personal identity. We can rarely deal creatively with our most basic difficulties without there being some fundamental change in our sense of identity. Our sense of identity is intimately associated with our most intimate friends and associates; and with the people who form our own personal community. We cannot deal creatively with our most fundamental difficulties without some changes in our sense of identity and so without some changes in our relationships with our most intimate friends and associates. We may need to change how we relate to our most intimate friends and associates. We may need to change who we associate with most intimately and frequently. Such changes will usually entail some change in our sense of identity. Only dead people have an unchanging identity. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================