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This is http://www.essayz.com/a8906142.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %IRRITABLE JACK BLAME OTHERS SELF REACTION ATTITUDE 890614 Jack's habits of mind and heart lead him to be irritable. It is Jack's attitude that what other people do causes him to be irritable. In his perception it is other people's actions which are the cause of his irritation and the logical conclusion is that other people should stop doing things which irritate him. Jack is operating in an objective paradigm of cause and effect in which causes and effects are perceived as objective realities; and no perceptive consideration are given to subjective realities which play essential roles in the total picture. Jack does not perceive his habits of mind and heart as subjective realities which set the stage for his being irritated by what other people do. Jack does not perceive that by modest changes in his habits of mind and heart he might be less irritated by what other people do, and be able to live a life with more serenity and tranquility. Jack describes to others what will happen if they do what he fears that they may do. He says he will become irritated and probably become very upset. Jack honestly believes that he is merely describing a probable course of objective events which will happen if others do foolish things. Jack's "description" is received as a threat by others who fear Jack and they respond to his description as a threat, and try to avoid irritating Jack by trying to avoid doing things which irritate Jack. Jack continues to be irritated because there is no finite set of objective causes which are the cause of Jack's irritability. People can try as they will to avoid irritating Jack by avoiding those actions which have irritated Jack in the past. Yet, what irritates Jack changes because the irritation is not in the objective realities as much as it is in the symbolism which Jack assigns to objective realities. Jack is dependent upon others and resents the fact that he is dependent upon others. Jack is addicted in ways which makes him dependent upon his codependents who support him when he does not take care of himself. Jack controls others through his dependency and their compulsive rescues of him when he presents great dependency; but Jack resents his dependency. Jack is irritated by whatever happens which reminds him of his dependency; if it is not one thing, it is another thing which reminds him of his dependency. His whole life is full of reminders of his great dependency which is the key to his ability to control others. Jack is irritated by his codependent's actions because most of them remind him of his great dependency. It is not the particular actions of others which irritate Jack; it is his dependent habits of mind and heart which set the stage for his being irritated by actions which remind him of his great dependency. Jack is irritable because he is playing the addictive/collusive game of being in control through manipulative dependency. Jack's codependents cannot help but irritate Jack by being his codependents who rescue him and make him more dependent. All of these considerations become of major significance if Jack has great power in political, business, educational, religious, or other type of institutional setting. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================